Far too often, many of us take rejection as a stop sign rather than a step toward success. Yes, rejection is harsh, and sometimes it truly is crushing.
But it’s like revered biokineticist Simone Danielle Conley has learnt. “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.”
After her exit from TS Galaxy, together with head coach Owen Da Gama, she went from rejection to rejection.
Of course, the Kaizer Chiefs one sounds like a ‘so near, yet so far’ moment for her. She recalls making a killer presentation in front of the Soweto giants’ hierarchy. She had been told the presentation was merely a formality.
ARTHUR ZWANE WANTED TO WORK WITH SIMONE CONLEY
“Arthur [Zwane] had said he would love me to work with me. We had previously worked together in the Nikey thing – CHANCE. I said I was ready. I’d do what I need to do.
“I did a presentation, and Kaizer Jnr showed me around the Village. He spoke to me as if it was a done deal. He even showed me where I would park,” she tells FARPost from New Zealand, where she is with Banyana Banyana at the FIFA Women’s World Cup.
After that meeting, she says she was told to stop taking other interviews as her job was secure.
But, surprisingly, weeks went by, and there was no communication from the club. Obviously concerned, she followed up and was eventually told “they had changed their minds and were going with someone else”.
Her next stop was Orlando Pirates, who played open cards with her. She would only get the job on condition that the incoming coach did not bring anyone. However, Jose Riveiro came with his team.
“They made it clear that it would depend on a head coach who was coming in. If they were bringing in an international coach, it would be unlikely.”
Her track record, dating back to her days at Highlands Park, remained impeccable nonetheless.
When she joined TS Galaxy, 11 players were injured, and she helped nine return to full fitness.
With all the heartbreaks, she thought of leaving football several times. Maybe it was time to leave the game and try another discipline.
Another disappointment at Sekhukhune United did not make matters any better. This time, the issue was seemingly that she was a woman.
WHY IS EVERYONE ANTI-ME?
“Should I just leave football? Why is everyone anti-me? I even went to Sekhukhune but was told they don’t want a woman because you’ll be touching men. So, because of the periods, it would not be possible to get the job.”
Before football, she had worked with rugby teams. So, she reached out to one of the top teams.
“I thought, let me go back to rugby. Maybe this was God saying go back to rugby.”
At AmaZulu, when she was close to joining Benni McCarthy’s backroom staff, the Bafana Bafana legend was fired. It spelt the end of any hopes of working with the now Manchester United first-team coach.
But, as always, God had the ultimate plan for her. It was women’s football she had to serve.
“God directed me towards women’s football.”
She had initially hesitated to go for women’s football because “she needed to earn a living”. “It was impossible with women’s football.”
The renaissance started with a COSAFA Cup gig under Banyana Banyana’s stand-in coach, Simphiwe Dludlu. That youthful Banyana side finished second in the 2022 COSAFA tournament.
Conversations with Jerry Tshabalala were already ongoing. But before that, Sipho Mbule had to get back to fitness before his first pre-season with Mamelodi Sundowns. He had not played for SuperSport in a long time.
“Mike Makaab started this whole thing; he asked me to prepare Sipho Mbule since he was on the sidelines. Mike called me to Sundowns to work with Sipho to get him to a certain condition before pre-season.”
One thing led to the other. When Sundowns Ladies saw what she was doing for Mbule, they asked for help.
JOINING MAMELODI SUNDOWNS LADIES
“I joined Downs because they had four girls they needed for the CAF Champions League. It was voluntary, I wasn’t contracted, and I was not being paid.
“Eventually, they brought me in as a service provider. I would provide the service of conditioning and bio.”
It posed a bit of a challenge, though, as she needed more time to work on the players. But at least she was back in the game. This time, the women’s game.
Something was different, though. She could enter the dressing rooms and do her work without thinking twice. It was unlike in the men’s game.
“I didn’t have to worry about being in the change room or what I see when they ice bath. I had to get used to minding my way around the boys. With women, there was a level of comfort which was very satisfying.”
Then, she realised she was like an apostle sent for the women’s game. While busy with Sundowns, she found a job in Saudi Arabia. She sent her CV, and the agent called her an hour later. Ironically, the impressive thing on her CV was her experience in the men’s game.
Her name was put forward, and interviews were done. But there was a tiny problem. She had gotten attached to the Sundowns players and didn’t want to leave abruptly. But she had to make a living.
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FINDING A NICHE IN WOMEN’S FOOTBALL
“I didn’t wanna leave Sundowns. Yes, I was a service provider and wanted to be full-time with them. How do you leave something you’ve just started?
“I had built a great working relationship with the players and staff at Sundowns. I had started understanding Sundowns and finding my niche in women’s football.”
Before accepting the Saudi offer, she made the Brazilians aware an overseas team was courting her.
“I spoke to the powers that be at Sundowns, and nothing came up.”
In fact, she sat on her contract from a Thursday to Monday, hoping the Brazilians would come around.
On Monday, exactly two hours after signing, Tshabalala called her and told her Yugesh [Singh – Sundowns managing director] and an offer would be coming. Unfortunately, she had already put pen to paper. Her next destination was Al Ittihad.
“It was tough for me to leave Sundowns Ladies. I cried, and the girls cried, too. I had found my eternal home at Sundowns.
“I hope the door will be open for me to return one day. Those girls are an exceptional group of players.”
At Ittihad, she works with revered American coach Kelly Ann Lindsey. Being the consummate professional she is, Conley would not just up and leave Downs. She could if she wanted to because there was no binding contract.
“The coach is heaven sent, what a professional, what a good human being. We’ve been working since May.
“Ittihad wanted me there from June, but I explained to them that I didn’t want to leave on bad terms. I asked to finish towards a certain point with Sundowns. Some players had long-term injuries.
“I didn’t feel it was right to leave people in the lurch. It wasn’t easy. I finished the notice period, and they finally announced.”
THERE WERE LESSONS
Lindsey then had to step in to let the club allow her to travel with Banyana to the FIFA Women’s World Cup.
“They wanted me early and would not allow me to attend the World Cup. Coach Lindsay understood what it meant to my career. The development, learning opportunities and how good it would be for my CV.”
With the big job in thriving Saudi, all that doubt, that rejection was God’s plan. There were lessons in the wait. She needed to get closer to her God for Him to guide her to her next assignment.
“Keep knocking on doors. Your door is going to open for you. I knocked on so many doors, and they never opened until mine opened.”
But the Naturena door opened and closed back on her face.